I miss you.

Diane,
I wish I could talk to you. You have been gone over two years and your birthmonth is approaching. I dread it. This grief is threatening to define me and I do not want that. You and God wouldn't either, I know. Maybe those are the only reasons I don't want it. And that my family deserves better. 

A lot has happened to me since you left that I wish I could have talked with you about. Big things have happened like deciding to move (truly a big thing by itself) and then actually moving.  Brian's job change has been so challenging. The adjustments  the kids have made are admirable. I became a mentor, which is simultaneously exciting and laughable. I am anxious about a medical exam and I could really use your guidance in how much grace I should give myself. See? Just that sentence would have set you off on a sermon. 

Max is graduating high school and turning 18. Eighteen!!  We are fast approaching the last day in all the world that I can say my son will be an adult in months!  Other big things is that a guy wanted to ask Madi out and Brian told him no. Then it happened again months later and Brian said yes. Then Madi said yes, so she is going to a high school dance this weekend. My little girl is going to a high school dance!  That is something this homeschooling momma never anticipated. Nor did I expect to have a 15 year old girl going on a date of any sort. I would like to talk with you about it all in excited rushes and in quiet confessionals. 

The kids are so full of personality. They make me laugh and I know you would love to listen to their ideas. They take becoming adults seriously, but attack the tasks from such different perspectives, it is fascinating. I would love your wisdom in how to best mother them through these transitions. 

My marriage is really good. Work, for sure, but shockingly, blessedly good. We are so thankful for the hand you still play in that truth. 

We are going to buy a car. Since we haven't done that in 15 years, that qualifies as a big thing, too. 

But even more pressing are all the little things. The nothings that do not even need to be talked about are what I want to talk about. I miss you much because of these. Yesterday my poop looked like a circumcised penis and I think you would have liked to have known that. I came up with a game show idea called 'Do You Trust Yourself?' and NO ONE has any interest in hammering out the details with me. Just because my initial plan involved wiping a contestant's memory. What's with that?  Ever since Caleb gave me whooping cough, whenever I get sick, my lungs snore. I want to tell you my thoughts on Grimm since you wanted me to watch the show so badly and I refused. I finished HIMYM just for you, too. I couldn't do Hawaii 5-0, though. 

Walking across the many bridges at my apartment complex in the rain scares the shit out of me. They are so slippery and I think falling would ruin more than my day. It rains every week here and never snows. It is an effort to not be burdened by that. It rains all day and all night. All night. 

Our new neighbors got two dogs and one is a pit!  Part of me wants to rip my shirt open in the ever-falling rain while collapsing to my knees and wailing 'Why?!?' to the sky, half hoping to drown like a stupid chicken. The other part is all fat little determined Disney fairy, determined to go all out Jesus on their asses. Like, I am gonna learn whatever lesson God has for me so that I never have to live under a fricken dog for the rest of my life!

Oh, I really want to tell you about Buttercup. She is precious. Glimpsing from my angle into the foster system stirs up so much in me, it would be such a help to talk it all out with you. There are quite a few things I cannot even bring myself to type that I would talk with you about. These things are so mysterious and confusing that I only whisper them to God and Brian. 

We started attending a new church. We want to be involved in a church family so much but we are terrible misfits wherever we go. I have hope and fear that I would really like to carry to the Throne with you. 

Brian is sick.  So....  you know. That sucks. 

I could really use your words, too. I want to hear about David and Kiso and Cher. How you are proud and when you are concerned? I want to pray for your friends who are moving through crises. I want to be inspired by your choices to grow. And I could stand to hear one more sermon on how great I am. 

I want to end this like David did, with praises to God. He supplies. He is faithful. He is loving. Yup. All true. But I still miss you. 

Who Needs the Church?

We are taught to have faith in God alone. We are taught to not rely on people for success or happiness because people fail. God is reliable because He is God. He never casts a shifting shadow (James 1:17). He is the same yesterday, today and forever (Hebrews 13:8). He will not crush the weakest reed or snuff out a flickering candle (Isaiah 42:3; Matthew 12:20). His word never returns void (Isaiah 55:11). He keeps His promises (Deuteronomy 7:9). So, that is God. Trust Him. Obey Him. Rely on Him. He won't let you down. 

We are taught with equal emphasis to not trust people. We cannot realistically rely in others for our happiness or success. All that God is, people are not. (Romans 3:10-18) In fact Scriptures admonish people to not even trust their own hearts!  (Jeremiah 17:9; Mark 7:21) Wow!  If we cannot even trust ourselves, it seems pretty foolish to lean on anyone else. 

But then there is the Church. This is where it gets really messy. -1-Trust and obey God, -2-do not rely on people, -3-the church (essentially the people of God) is God's gift to people to help them get through this life on fallen earth. What are we supposed to do with that?

On the one hand, we trust God.  I mean, let's say I am going skydiving for the first time. I listen to every word the instructor says like my life depends on it--because it does!  So, as he hands me my gear, declaring, "you'll want these, that, and this," I will agree wholeheartedly that I want them all and grab up everything he offers. I'd be crazy not to. 

I trust God, and I am jumping into a free-falling world. So, I hang on to the Instructor's Words. I grab onto every piece of gear he offers and tuck them close to my body. I fix the earpiece firmly in place so that I will hear any further words of guidance. 

What is the equipment god gives?  I see three main things that every Christian receives as help to live an abundant life here and now: the Holy Spirit, the Bible and the Church. 

The Holy Spirit is God in us loving us as Counselor, Advocate, Comforter.  John 14:16 says "And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another Advocate, who will never leave you.  He is the Holy Spirit, who leads into all truth.  The world cannot receive him, because it isn't looking for him and doesn't recognize him.  But you know him, because he lives with you now and later will be in you."  Further in the chapter, at verse 26, Jesus continues, "But when the Father sends the Advocate as my representative--that is, the Holy Spirit--he will teach you everything and will remind you of everything I have told you."

The Bible is the Word of God.  It is a reliable, breathing text we use to grow one another up in the Lord. 2 Timothy 3:16-17 says "All Scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives.  It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right. God uses it to prepare and equip his people to do every good work." 

Now we come to the Church. We are the Body of Christ, reaching into this world with the Gospel of forgiveness, healing and reconciliation to the One True God. Jesus built the Church, and almost all of the New Testament is written to the Church.  These letters were expected to be read to the gathering of believers.  The instructions and encouragements are for all who call Christ Lord and Savior. 

Check out 

Romans 15:14 

And concerning you, my brethren, I myself also am convinced that you yourselves are full of goodness, filled with all knowledge and able also to admonish one another.

Colossians 3:16

Let the word of Christ richly dwell within you, with all wisdom teaching and admonishing one another with psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with thankfulness in your hearts to God.

Luke 17:3

Be on your guard! If your brother sins, rebuke him; and if he repents, forgive him

1 Thessalonians 5:14

We urge you, brethren, admonish the unruly, encourage the fainthearted, help the weak, be patient with everyone.

All of Romans 12 and 1 Corinthians 12 speak to the form and function of the church. 

After reading just these few excerpts, knowing there is so much more of the same, I am thinking the Church is some 'gear' that I will 'be wanting' to get me through this 'jump.' 

I have no issue with working alongside people who share truth and love, ministering to the lost. But here is the trouble. Remember all that wisdom from the beginning?  Rely on God alone. He is my rock.  My all in all. He says I need this Church, not only as co-workers, but as encouragers, companions and givers of love.  They aren't co-workers. The Church is not a business. They are family (Ephesians 2:19). I am to submit to the people in my church (Ephesians 5:21). I am to confess to them and ask for prayers (James 5:16). These things call for interdependence, vulnerability and transparency. But the Church is made of people. People!  Flawed, selfish, lying, betraying heart breakers. And I need this?   I'd like to argue.

Beware the yeast

“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” Proverbs 4:23 NLT

“Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.”

‭‭James‬ ‭4:8‬ ‭NLT‬‬

Remember Daniel's interpreting the king's dream of the statue with the clay and iron feet?  We can read about it in chapter 2. In verse 43, we hear Daniel explain that the blending of theses two materials makes both weak. They do not mix at all, so it is just a whole mass of seams that work like perforations: highlighting weaknesses to be attacked.  When I think about Christians trying to absorb the values and lifestyle of their culture, I think about iron and clay. What God offers is strong and perfect, like iron.  The baked clay of human tradition is less so, by a lot.  And they do not blend.  We can try to comfort ourselves thinking that if we are attacked that the weak clay will be the only thing to crumble and the iron will survive any smashing. But picture it:  what will the iron be after being crushed?  Raw material, twisted remnants that cut and injure. The spaces that the clay occupied will leave gaping holes that separate the iron, leaving it strewn about without a form or a function. 

These are just my ponderings, though.  The Christian life was never compared to iron and clay in the Bible.

Jesus went further. 

Matthew 16:6-12; Mark 8:15; Luke 12:1. 

Jesus warns us to beware the yeast of Pharisees. What does that mean?  Is it the people who are Pharisees?  I do not think so, because Paul was a Pharisee, as was Nicodemus. Jesus ate in the homes of Pharisees. Jesus also talked with, taught, and healed at least one roman's servant.  He is not against people. He came specifically to save them.

But he did scold people.  Why?  For their practices and teachings! He does not like sin and really does not like people in authority leading others into sin. Jesus took special interest in Pharisees teaching and practicing laws that were added to Moses' laws delivered by God. Luke 11:46, mark 7:7 ff. 

So, the yeast we must beware of is the teachings of the Pharisees. False teachings that do not blend with the Truth of God. 

One problem with man-made traditions is that they seem so harmless. More than that, they often seem good and wise.  Just thinking about a new rule that will eliminate confusion brings sighs of peace. Men are pretty smart. We are creative. This is no surprise, since we are made in God's image. So our traditions often make a lot of sense!  We go along because it is a well-worn path. And often, there is no conflict to our consciences in doing so.  So, what's the problem? There isn't one; until we are lulled into trusting the ways of men. Have you ever heard anyone say, 'I do not know why we do it that way; it's just how we have always done it.'  

That leads us to the other problem with man-made traditions: we cannot serve two masters. There is a point when there will be disagreement, and you have to choose what or who is supreme. Sadly, we realize this after following along so blindly and so easily for so long, our minds are asleep to the conflict. 

In Galatians, Paul affirms Jesus' assertions to avoid the yeast that would re-enslave us after Jesus' work that freed us. He speaks specifically about circumcision, but I believe it is reasonable to apply it to any false teaching.  “For when we place our faith in Christ Jesus, there is no benefit in being circumcised or being uncircumcised. What is important is faith expressing itself in love. You were running the race so well. Who has held you back from following the truth? It certainly isn’t God, for he is the one who called you to freedom. This false teaching is like a little yeast that spreads through the whole batch of dough! I am trusting the Lord to keep you from believing false teachings. God will judge that person, whoever he is, who has been confusing you.” Galatians 5:6-10 NLT

Yeast.  It is a leavener that permeates every iota of dough to which it is added. There is no compartmentalizing. Remember those feet made of iron and clay?  While not strong, and not blended, we can physically point to what is iron and what is clay. It is obvious.  In a blend with yeast, however, there is no distinction. Yeast touches everything. You cannot make a loaf with yeast and find a piece of that bread without it. 

So, when we try to blend the world with the Way, we have a real problem. Jesus said beware. False teaching comes in and touches everything. It is messy.  And once in, it is hard to identify.  It blends so smoothly. 

I would like to end with Psalm 101 by King David. It is easy to dismiss the idea of living this zealously because it talks about hating people and ridding the city of evil. Since The work of the Messiah, we are not to hate any people, and none of us has servants of any caliber.  But does that mean we cannot internalize this Psalm for our own lives in Christ?  Do we really want to be this focused on living for God?  Listen to all the 'I will's. Will you?

“I will sing of your love and justice, LORD. 

I will praise you with songs. 

I will be careful to live a blameless life— when will you come to help me? 

I will lead a life of integrity in my own home. 

I will refuse to look at anything vile and vulgar. 

I hate all who deal crookedly; 

I will have nothing to do with them. 

I will reject perverse ideas and stay away from every evil. 

I will not tolerate people who slander their neighbors. 

I will not endure conceit and pride. 

I will search for faithful people to be my companions. Only those who are above reproach will be allowed to serve me. 

I will not allow deceivers to serve in my house, and liars will not stay in my presence. My daily task will be to ferret out the wicked and free the city of the LORD from their grip.” Psalms 101:1-8 NLT

Amen

Written All Over My Face

Revelation 22:4 reads: “And they will see his face, and his name will be written on their foreheads.”

This is a neat use of words. I do not think it is literal. I do not imagine we will be walking around with lettering on our faces.

Instead, I remember old cartoons of eyes turning into protruding dollar signs or pulsing hearts to express the character's all-consuming adulation and worship of an object. 

More realistically, I call to mind all the momma's faces I have seen when they first hold their newborns. Aren't the babies' names written on the faces of those sweaty, worn out, exultant moms?  We do not even need to see the child when we look at mom. Everything that matters is already on her face. 

I imagine this is what we will reflect when we finally get to stand in front of the throne of God. We will be reflecting back His glory, as the moon does the sun. But more!  All metaphors will be gone, all analogy passé, all comparisons obsolete. We will be in the overwhelming reality of the realized promise.  We will be living in a way these fallen bodies cannot. 

How I long for that day!  Until then, I must continue to strive for His name to be written on this face I have now. I must wait with confident expectation that I will one day be in His presence with a new body that will withstand His glory. As I wait, I pray saving from distraction and urgency to invite others to wait with me. 

Being Sanctified

Advent and Communion both look forward to the coming of Jesus.  Here I would like to talk about Advent. 

Luke 16:9-13 reads as follows:

Here’s the lesson: Use your worldly resources to benefit others and make friends. Then, when your earthly possessions are gone, they will welcome you to an eternal home.^c

“If you are faithful in little things, you will be faithful in large ones. But if you are dishonest in little things, you won’t be honest with greater responsibilities. And if you are untrustworthy about worldly wealth, who will trust you with the true riches of heaven? And if you are not faithful with other people’s things, why should you be trusted with things of your own?

“No one can serve two masters. For you will hate one and love the other; you will be devoted to one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and money.”

O Come, O come, Emmanuel  is a popular Christmas Carol that tells parallel stories that can help guide us today.  The lyrics of the first verse go this way.

O come, O come, Emmanuel

And ransom captive Israel

That mourns in lonely exile here

Until the Son of God appear

Rejoice! Rejoice! Emmanuel

Shall come to thee, O Israel.'

Israel had rejected God and sought its own way, the world's way. In becoming a pagan nation, it determined to refuse a theocracy and chose the chaos of survival of the fittest, kings vying for power.  At the time of Jesus' birth, they were truly captives, living dispersed.  Those Jews who were in Jerusalem did so as subjects to the Roman Empire. Jews in charge were in a delicate political dance with Rome. They were only in charge as long as they submitted to the ruling empire. They were captives in need of a rescuer. And there were God-lovers mourning in lonely exile. And we know from the stories about people like Simeon and Anna that there was great rejoicing when the long-awaited Messiah finally, finally came!

American Christians are not so different. Our history is of racial tensions that spill into significant hate-filled violence in every decade of the country's existence.  We make justice more about politics than true righteousness. Our laws, courts and prisons give grace to the rich and severity to minorities and the disenfranchised. A casual observer could easily believe that Americans read the Beatitudes in Matthew chapter 5 and instituted the exact opposite standards for the meek, merciful, mourning, peacemakers, righteous and pure from what Jesus prescribed.  

We trust that 'someone' will take care of the needy. In fact, according to the IRS website, from 2005 to 2010 average charitable contributions went from 2.5 to 2.1 percent, totaling considerably less than 2,000 dollars per income each year.  One of the richest nations with approximately 173 billion souls claiming to follow Christ, and these are the numbers on charitable giving!  How can that be?  

I saw a statistic recently that said if one family in three churches adopted an 'adoptable' child out of the foster care system and the three churches committed to supporting that family, we could effectively abolish the foster care program in the United States as an institution that cares for children who age out of the system without ever being permanently placed in a family.  We can make a difference in this world.  Believing we can't excuses selfish living and fulfills that prophesy.

All the while we are forgetting that obedience is not about results.“So, my dear brothers and sisters, be strong and immovable. Always work enthusiastically for the Lord, for you know that nothing you do for the Lord is ever useless.” (‭‭1 Corinthians‬ ‭15:58‬ ‭NLT‬‬)

Can we take a moment and be astonished that we actually stand tall and tell God no just because we think it will not turn out the way we want it to?

"Did you realize that you will find about 800 Scriptures that deal with money in the Bible?
Jesus talked about money more than He did Heaven and Hell combined. He talked about money more than anything else except the Kingdom of God. 11 of 39 parables talk about money. 1 of every 7 verses in the Gospel of Luke talks about money."  

(I found the above excerpt from a sermon)

Money matters.  We all know that loving enemies and forgiving everyone are commands by God that, while difficult, actually are for our benefit. We feel a peace and freedom when we obey them; so much so, that even unbelievers advocate a life of forgiveness and mercy.  Could it be that the instructions on money, the singular area of life that God actually invited testing (Malachi 3:10), are for our good, as well?

We are members of the eternal Kingdom of the One true God. Are you happy about that?  Can anyone tell?  Are you as burdened, stressed, unforgiving and greedy as your pagan family, neighbors and coworkers?  Have you invited Jesus to change your entire life?  Do you even want that?

I do not ask this to shame. I say it to identify. We are steeped in a culture of sin. Some of it we have become very comfortable with. And we need Jesus. We need Him to forgive us and transform us.  His blood washes us from sin and sets us before the judgment seat as righteous. We just need eyes to see this truth so that we live it. 

We are here to be living testimonies to a life of freedom that is possible on earth through Christ. But how can anyone believe what we have to say when our own behavior betrays that we do not believe it ourselves. 

Christmas is coming and we have some choices to make about how we will experience the Advent season. I guarantee we all celebrate advent, whether you know or like the word. It means Coming. In America, Advent seems to begin earlier each year and the focus is shopping, movies, sweets and decorations: the coming of pleasure and consumerism. In the tradition for Christians, Advent begins four Sundays before Christmas and the focus is on the Scripture, welcoming Jesus into our hearts and charity, which means love.  

These things are in opposition to one another. Jesus warned us in His great wisdom and care that we could not serve both. This world tells us differently. We like buffets and fear missing out, so blending a little from here and a little from there is super appealing. Tempting. While it is not a sin to be tempted, it most certainly is to not flee from it. What will the focus be for you?  What of the world will be welcomed into your homes, calendars and hearts?

Both the pagan* advent and the Christian Advent extend beyond the Christmas season, but they are heightened and glorified at this time that is fast approaching.  We will choose no matter what.  A passive choice will never land us with Jesus, but it counts as a choice nonetheless.

 

*I use the term pagan to mean non-Christian, referring to all who do not call on Jesus as Lord and Savior.

Mean People

The concept that hurting people hurt people is not a new one.  I have read more than one devotion teaching this idea—I most remember Joyce Meyer and Max Lucado.  Even so, I think it bears repeating.  This morning I read two blogs here and here that touched on the topic and how it relates to body image.  Both of these bloggers were speaking more specifically about how the marketed ‘ideal body’ doesn’t buy the happiness it promises.  They did a terrific job on that topic and I recommend reading both posts.

I’d like to focus on one point both articles touched on that they used to help explain that all the hate for heavy people has to come from somewhere—and it ain’t happiness!

This is important: if you are fielding ugliness from others, ask yourself why.  Happy people are typically too busy being happy to go out of their way to dump a heap of hate on anyone.  This makes sense because, like I said, hate comes from somewhere.  How can anyone with enough hate to spare ever be happy?  They simply cannot.  Hate is corrosive, it destroys the holder.  Why is this important?  Because it can help you know how to react most effectively; it can save you from perpetuating the hate.

Knowing the mean person is actually injured cuts through the chaos and affords you two invaluable pieces of information.  First, the obvious: there is someone injured in front of you.  That dictates a far different reaction than that of being attacked.  You can respond with compassion, and maybe even a little first aid.  This totally changes the balance of the interaction and it puts you in charge, instead of putting you on the defensive.

That leads me to the other piece of info: the crap they spew isn’t true!  Yeah, baby!  Read that again.  The hate and condemnation isn’t true AND… listen up!  It isn’t even about you!  Hate destroys the hater.  You don’t have any obligation to pick up what they drop.  Imagine injured animals.  They can get pretty nasty, but a caregiver would never imagine taking the snarls and teeth gnashing personally; they merely signify need.

So, next time some troll comes after you—on the internet or in the flesh, remember to keep your head.  This hater is carrying around poison as a constant companion.  That is sad.  Be compassionate.  Be kind.  Be different.  Just as important, don’t own any of that poison.  Look at what is doing to the hater! Do you want to turn into that?  I don’t think so!

Advent

Advent means ‘Coming’ and is the name of the church season just before Christmas, usually beginning with the fourth Sunday before December 25. There are Advent wreaths, candles, calendars and more to infuse each day with increasing anticipation. We anticipate not just the immediate Christmas Day celebration, but we also remember the first Christmas by reading about Zachariah, Elizabeth, the angels, Mary, Joseph, prophets, shepherds and wise men. The fullness of Christmas and Advent is realized when we turn our gaze to the future, when our risen living Lord will come once and for all. This is Advent: the preparation and anticipation of the coming Christ; past, present and future.

For the years of my childhood in the Episcopal church, Advent was a foregone conclusion. We observed it every year, with all the proverbial bells and smells. As a young married couple, my husband and I attended a non-liturgical church that didn't use the word Advent, but still enjoyed several activities to build anticipation for the coming of Christ. We supplemented their offerings with our own Christ-centered traditions.

This year, I asked my current church family members if they participate in Advent. Boy, the crickets were out in force!!  No one knew what I was talking about and no one seemed particularly interested in hearing about it.

I've been thinking about what happened since then. I may have asked the question poorly. I should have said, 'how do you celebrate Advent?'

The fact is, very few people living in America can escape Advent without making considerable effort. Christmas is everywhere from about Halloween to the end of the year. Songs, decorations, movies, shopping, parties, food, greetings...  Unbelievers are often as into the preparations as believers, so how can believers say they don't prepare for Christmas?  Why would they even want to say such a thing?

I know some believers shy away from certain forms of terminology, seemingly fearful of being mistaken for the 'wrong' denomination. But if there is a time for the Church to be united, wouldn't the celebration of The Christ's incarnation be a good one?  I would encourage all believers to educate themselves and learn some new words, because they aren't at all scary. If we know them, we can connect further with brothers and sisters in unified joy.

The big question is how do we show that we are anticipating the coming of Christ, rather than just the coming of December 25?  I mean, if Advent is all around us, we have the choice to be clear about just what it is we are anticipating with great joy!  Jesus said we cannot serve two masters (Matthew 6:24, Luke 16:13).  John told us to not love the world or anything in the world, or we do not have the Father in us (1John 2:15-17).  James reiterated that if we are friends of this world, we are enemies to God (James 4:4).  Yikes! So if our preparations for a holiday central to our faith is formed by the traditions and impressions of this culture, consider if these are holy and acceptable forms of worship to our most worthy God and King.

I would encourage believers to set aside time each day of this joyful season to focus on the One worth our worship, Who brings peace to every heart that welcomes Him.   The fact is, you are probably observing Advent either way; why not be purposeful and righteous in it?

  We have a few traditions to help us remember it is Christ's coming that we anticipate. We most often begin with decorating the house to high-volume carols. We read one of the following each night: Jotham's Journey, Bartholomew's Passage or Tabitha's Travels. These are loosely linked stories of three young people adventuring through the month before Jesus' birth in Bethlehem, learning Truth along the way. We have a few favorite movies, including The Very First Noel. I like to go caroling, but we haven't managed it in the last several years. We do exchange gifts and play what we call the 'stocking game.'  We talk about how Santa Claus is a legend borne from the inspiring life of a man who loved God and others. We have an Advent calendar where we add felt pieces to a nativity scene and an advent wreath with candles we light during our story time. In my personal devotion time, I add several plans that take me through prophesies and the Scriptures detailing the first Christmas.  Among our most cherished traditions, we participate in several charitable activities.  I prefer to observe the admonition to not let the left hand know what the right is doing (Matthew 6:3).  But if you are looking for ideas, I invite you to check out your local shelters, the Salvation Army, Samaritan’s Purse, World Vision and other organizations.  But charity doesn’t have to be only through large scale callings.  Be alert and prayerful so that you may see the needs you can fill in personal ways.

So, I put it to you. How do you observe Advent?  If it isn’t something you have thought much about, realize that our culture is already leading you through the season.  Maybe you can make some careful choices to permeate and persuade this world with love and light, rather than passively being invaded and occupied by all the things that Christ’s wonderful coming is not.

Merry Christmas!

Christians Should be More Like Geeks and Bikers

We recently went to Ashland, Oregon to enjoy the Shakespeare Festival.  It was an extraordinary trip that we will long remember and cherish.  One of the first days there, my Whovian daughter just had to have this shirt.

 

 

 

 

You know I now have to include a picture that doesn’t boast of the shirt as well, but totally showcases her awesome bubble!

 

Anyhow, of course she wore the shirt the very next day and we went down to breakfast at the hotel.  In line for pancakes I saw another girl about four or five years older than my daughter check out her shirt and give a nod of approval.  “Great shirt!”  Immediate camaraderie was born. I watched the interaction between the two girls who were strangers with great interest.  I know a lot of teenagers who wouldn’t give a younger girl a first glance.  But this shirt put them on common ground. 

My husband has a similar geek shirt that plays on the Keep Calm theme.  His says “…and Stay Shiny.”  Diehard Firefly/Serenity fans just eat it up.  I can’t count the number of conversations this shirt has started for my husband. 

Driving to a different state gives you plenty of time to watch the road and do some thinking.  Have you ever seen bikers pass each other?  No matter the weather, the location, the speed, they always give each other a wave.  There is again this foundational camaraderie established between strangers.  A leather-bound dude sees a three-piece suit holding  a helmet and there is a connection.  I find it fascinating.  They talk … well, I can’t even make up what they talk about because I am not a biker.  They have a language and interest all their own and the passion acts as a ligament that brings two disparate people into association. 

And I wonder…

Why aren’t more Christians like that?  I do see it on occasion.  I have this cool purse that I have gotten ‘knowing’ compliments on.  But I also see Christians focus more on the things that divide.  You are a Christian?  Really?  Do you dunk or dribble?  Do you have priests or pastors?  What do you think about women in leadership?  I’d love to see us take a page from the geek handbook and just love that we love the same thing—the same One.  I’d like us to see another family member and know we are all undeserving but traveling the best and only worthwhile road in all of life.  How about a head-nod, wave and a ‘keep carrying on.”?

That’d be cool.

Comfort

That is just not my comfort zone, my area of expertise, or—if I wanna sound über-holy—it’s just not my gifting.

These were my words. Whenever I didn't want to do something scary or new.  I would sometimes put on a brave face and do something I didn’t like.  But after consistently not liking it, I would declare in my most assuring voice that it simply wasn’t for me.  I was made for other ministry.

In theory there is nothing wrong with this.  I am a big fan of saying no to even good things to hold out for the best.  And I believe firmly that the Church has many people with many different gifts; no one person was meant to do it all. But this rationale only goes so far.  I can’t use personal discomfort as an excuse to disobey.

Jesus tells us with His own voice in the Gospels and with many voices throughout the rest of Scripture to serve, to love, to care, to heal, to give.  To whom shall we do these things?  Even if it weren’t explicitly spelled out (Luke 14:12-14 And He also went on to say to the one who had invited Him, “When you give a luncheon or a dinner, do not invite your friends or your brothers or your relatives or rich neighbors, otherwise they may also invite you in return and that will be your repayment.“But when you give a reception, invite the poor, the crippled, the lame, the blind, and you will be blessed, since they do not have the means to repay you; for you will be repaid at the resurrection of the righteous.” ), one can deduce that we are to serve those who don’t already have people doing stuff for them, love those who aren’t getting enough love, care for those who can’t care for themselves, heal those who are sick, and give to those who need something.  Anything else is rather nonsensical. 

That means we have to go and be in the company of servant-less, loveless, helpless, sick, needy people.  Generally speaking, it is safe to assume it won’t be a comfortable visit. 

My older sister is in a nursing home.  It sucks.  She is all of the things I listed and more.  She is high maintenance as she battles brain cancer that is attacking her motor skills, drugs that rob her memory and reasoning skills, lonliness that renders her needy and chemo that ravages all that is left.  The facility is understaffed and her family is busy with work and school.  Life goes on as she lies in a hospital bed hoping someone will visit.  Forget uncomfortable; it is a loathesome situation.

Way back when dinosaurs roamed the earth and I was a teenager I used to visit people in nursing homes with my mom.  Boy, it was uncomfortable!  I had real intellectual and ethical tangles with how to care for needy people while maintaining their dignity and respect.  Ultimately I decided it just wasn’t for me.  Not my gifting.  Others did it better.  I wouldn’t want to screw up.

Now my sister is in a nursing home.  2,000 miles away.  I can’t do anything for her when she calls and asks me to come sit with her.  I chuckle and keep things light so she won’t get discouraged.  I send her verses and studies.  I record myself telling her I love her.  It isn’t enough.

Surely my Diane isn’t the only one in a nursing home who doesn’t want to be there.  And there’s the rub.  WHO on Earth WANTS to be in a nursing home??!? WHO would sign up for THAT?  Bed sores and having to ask to use the rest room, hospital food and the mind-numbing monotony of the same four walls for…how long? 

That is when I could no longer deny it.  Obeying Jesus isn’t about comfort, or natural gifts or skillsets.  Jesus said do it.  What we can’t pull off on our own, He is going to cover, right?  Or do we not actually believe Him to be God?

Think about His list: the widows, the orphans, the poor, the sick, the imprisoned…  What do all these people have in common?  Their choice has been taken away.  None chose to lose a loved one, to be hungry or disabled.  Even the worst criminal who deserves to be locked up for life has undeniably lost his choice to be where he wants to be.  And our amazing, patient and merciful God just adores choice.  It is central to the entire design of this universe and the life of every human being.  Without choice, there is no meaning to life.  God loves choice so much that He preserves it at an exorbitant price; many a man (and woman and child) has questioned if all the suffering in this fallen world is frankly too high a price for this gift.

When God sees people lose this gift of choice, He calls His people to go be, to stand in the gap, even if only to witness the loss. 

I guarantee my sister never chose to be in a nursing home.  I can no longer say that I won’t go comfort those who locally are in her situation simply because it is outside my comfort zone.  What about their comfort zones? I may not have the gift for caring expertly for people who are disabled, but I bring with me the Gifter of all Gifts wherever I go.  He’s got it covered.

Respect

Exclusivity is a no-no.  It is intolerant, narrow minded and offensive.  We don’t like it when people speak too strongly about right and wrong, in and out.  It hurts feelings, is judgmental and shows an ugly pride.

The problem is that this notion is paradoxical.  “We can be sure of nothing!” begs the question, “Are you sure?”  The same is true with “There are no absolutes!” Yes, of course… “Absolutely!”  See the problem?  Exclusivity is a no-no.  So, you are excluding those who exclude?  It isn’t right to say that something is wrong?  These arguments just don’t hold water.

Of course, the notion behind most of these statements is that it is unkind to dismiss the beliefs of others or to outright condemn people for their philosophies and behavior.  The preschool lessons to get along are well ingrained in our society, and haven’t really developed beyond a preschool mentality to just be nice.  And who doesn’t think being nice is wrong all by itself? 

What is ‘nice,’ though?  Is it always agreeing all the time?  That really would keep us all as preschoolers, never allowing ourselves to discuss anything beyond the most elementary (heh heh) topics.  Most of us weren’t made for that.  Life has complexities and we need to work through them.  For us to live a life with any meaning, we have to make choices.  Any choice for something is also a choice against at least one other something.  If we bind ourselves to this idea that choosing against things, excluding, is offensive, we imprison ourselves in a false world of the ever-yes.  It doesn’t exist and so it paralyzes us.

So, we make choices.  We must.  And the choices necessarily exclude.  We disagree.  If we are going to graduate from preschool, we have to learn how to do this without being ugly.  But we also have to grow up enough to allow OTHERS to choose and exclude and NOT be offended by it!  The reason we teach three and four year olds to be kind in the form of inclusiveness is because they are spending time with other three and four year olds who are only just developing their fragile egos and necessarily require some tender handling. 

When I taught, I worked hard to not tell the kids their guesses were outright wrong, because in spite of whatever topic currently being explored, the real lesson was for the child to try, experiment and be bold.  Getting the answer right was in fact irrelevant to my true goal, so I said, ‘You answered so quickly.’ ‘Keep trying.’ Guess again.’ ‘Look here for a clue.’ ‘Thank you for sharing.’ ‘So close!’ ‘I see why you can think that.’ ‘Have you thought about this?’ ‘I see you working so hard.’ ‘Don’t give up!’  Instead of using the word no, I would say yes, after…  Or yes, as soon as…  Or yes, once we…

This encouragement was always on my lips as my kids struggled to learn and grow and master.  I modeled it and expected the kids in my care to use similar sentiments as they offered help to their peers.  I wanted my kids to see themselves as able, to see the world as full of possibilities.  The phrases that became part of my being conveyed sky’s-the-limit concepts that would best equip my kids to face challenges with confidence.

I don’t regret this.  I believe it is right and good.  Eventually, however, the word no must be used.  Limits are set.  Choices are made.  We need to teach kids—and be adults who model—to accept this without it crushing them.  We have failed, in my opinion to handle this part of child rearing, and we now have a society of people who seem to LOOK to be hurt.

One of the contributors to this easily offended mentality is the importance we place on the court of public opinion.  We live to please others, to garner praise and recognition.  So, when someone disagrees, it is a deeply personal blow.  We have to realign our sense of selves to EXCLUDE the need for homogeny. 

My family chooses to not participate in our local soccer league.  We have reasons; some are reasonable and others are totally emotional and reactionary.  Regardless of our reasons and their validity, I am often astounded when I meet with hostility because of our choice.  I have friends who have raised their voices at me because I don’t sign my kids up for this particular sport!  Why on earth is this an issue? 

Soccer is silly and passing.  But what about bigger things that truly matter and have lasting impact?  We have to be ok with people choosing creeds, lifestyles and philosophies that go against our own choices.  We have to handle the disagreement as an honest disagreement without it being an affront.  That means I don’t have to pretend that all choices are ok  with me, and neither do you.  It also means that I cannot place the obligation to keep me happy on every individual who lives in my city, state, country and world!!  And, yet, that is essentially our final destination here: you aren’t a small-town, home-birthing, home-schooling, home-churching, stay-at-home-momming, family oriented, geekifying, game-playing, food-loving, mission-supporting, conservative-ish Christian person??  Well, fie on you! 

See how lonely I’d be?  Not to mention totally ineffective in any endeavor I’d like to accomplish.

So, make choices that exclude and be honest about it.  Allow others to do the same.  Choosing a faith in anything other than Jesus Christ should not offend me even though I believe that Jesus is the only Way, Truth and Life.  Being offended by Joe who believes differently dictates that Joe is obligated to smooth my ruffled feathers—a total paradox to what I claim!!  If Jesus is the ONLY way, why would I allow Joe the power to upset me and require Joe to change in order for me to be at peace?  That is a whole lotta Joe and a whole lotta me involved in a world view I purport to be Christ-focused.  That is utterly nonsensical.

We have to stop blending the line between offense and disagreement.  They are not the same.

 

Caregiving

Aside from my children, my two most favorite people are Brian my husband and Diane my sister. Aside from children, the only people for whom I have provided care are Brian and Diane. And, aside from the facts that they were in the position of needing care and needed it at the same time AND lived 2000 miles apart, the opportunity to provide care for each of them was ideal.

I love them. Neither had pointedly diminished mental capacities. Neither had (at the point when I was providing care) lost bladder or bowel control.  Both feel tenderly towards me. Both respond protectively towards me. I have a relationship with each that is intimate, relaxed and authentic.

Because of this, I repeat, caring for my 'patients' was ideal. I know professional caregivers are under different circumstances. I know family members have to care for less pleasant 'patients' than I have. And I know the care I have provided has been extremely short term. So, for the third and final time, my caregiving experiences are ideal.

Providing care merely was a natural response of love I have for two people who have loved me unconditionally since the day I met them. It was easy.

It was hard. In helping them with basic needs--meds, toilet, shower, clothes, memory, bed--there was nothing awkward about being together, but their very need made them each vulnerable and somehow reduced. There is an almost innate loss of dignity in being unable to independently do the self-care tasks we mastered in our first years of life. As a caregiver, it seems important to give yourself to a degree to BE the person for whom you are caring. A caregiver needs to BE the 'patient's' hands, doing for them what they cannot. There is a corresponding non-physical element of self that is turned over to the patient to help restore that dignity. It is unspoken and even undefined.

This unspoken component is a forever bond between caregiver and patient. I actually see this play out more in the care that my other family members are giving my sister. Through bits and pieces that are revealed, I am seeing only that there are large portions closely held in obscurity. I myself shield Diane and Brian by never speaking about some of our time together.

Caregiving seems such a quiet thing. Even the one being cared for will never know what the caregiver does. They don't need to. It isn't about you, and they are going through plenty without needing to comfort the caregiver.

This moratorium on discussion may be no burden to some, but for those of us who tend to process life through the use of words, it can be a challenge. But that is the nature of caregiving: it is all about self-sacrifice. The motto? "It's not about you."

For the purpose of caregiving, these are the facts, whether they are true or not: You are not sick. You are strong. You are well-rested. You have energy to give. You are clear headed and organized. You are patient. You are clean. You don't have anyplace more important to be.

I found that even when there were truths to contradict these facts, the facts remained. I may have been tired, but it didn't matter when the meds alarm goes off in the middle of the night.  I may be behind in my own med schedule and feeling a little wobbly, but if they were in immediate need, I was going to be able to wait until their need was met.

And the ultimate fact that supersedes all others? You never judge.

I may not choose something for myself, but I just could NOT stand in judgment of their choices. It would have jeopardized the trust that was essential to providing the best possible care. They were already so vulnerable. You simply don't pick at someone when they are compelled to such extreme exposure.  If you have any issue with that, all it takes is half a second of imagining someone into your own most personal world.

Caregiving is holy. It is what Jesus does. It is ultimate scut- and servant work. You do the work so intimate that you are bonded by non-disclosure agreements--before there was ever such a thing. You are a living sacrifice, you lay down your life for a friend. There is no greater act of love. (Romans 12:1, John 15:13)

There is a caveat, of course. Since we aren't actually Jesus, we cannot give ourselves wholly in the way He can and does. We do have needs and we do have weaknesses--one of which is an ability to turn caregiving into something unhealthy. How like humanity to twist something so good and holy!  But that is what co-dependence and enabling are: perverted caregiving.

It is important to set boundaries.  We must rely on God and direct our patients to do the same. We must keep our eyes on the goal of health, for ourselves and our patients. That plays out in taking care of our own needs and pursuing activities that maintain our full personhood. It means not designing a situation that sets us up as being irreplaceable. For our patients, we must encourage their self-care in the instances that they can carry out the tasks. We must strike the balance of being dependable without creating a false dependence to stroke any personal desires to feel needed. While we may rest comfortably in the role of servant, we cannot allow our identity to be bound up in being any person's provider. We each have one Provider, and trying to step into His shoes is folly best avoided.

Nevertheless, I see caregivers as secret superheroes and feel as though if one were to look long enough, ethereal capes would become visible and flap inaudibly in otherwise imperceptible breezes. Those capes shield their charges and mask the unspoken provision one person is humble-honored to do for another in need. The cape elevates the superhero above the busy distractions of this life to an unseen dominion that reminds us of what life is all about: relationships, interdependence and love.

Nerdy

Check out the photo I found on Pinterest below (Don’t you just love Pinterest?).  I have a whole board that celebrates nerds.  Nerd hasn’t always been an embraceable term, though.  When I was growing up, to be called a nerd was pretty disparaging.  I took it upon myself to do the eighth-grade essay-hack and looked up the word on Dictionary.com.  Even though I knew there would be unfavorable points, I was shocked at number one: “a stupid, irritating, ineffectual, or unattractive person.” Wow. Number two is slightly less insulting: “an intelligent but single-minded person obsessed with a nonsocial hobby or pursuit.”   The kindest sentiment and seeming only saving grace was from the proverbial mother advising her girl to be kind to the nerds, since they will be rich one day.

Thankfully, our progressive society has cultivated a more enlightened perspective on the formerly beleaguered nerd.  New definitions have popped up, some I much prefer over others. This picture is my most favorite definition.  I find it to be inspiringly beautiful and liberating.  Fantastic, yes?

I have to say, my entire family is a collection of nerds.  Our bookshelves and DVD collections would betray us if we were ever trying to mask it.  Our shelves sag under books exploring apologetics, science fiction, fantasy and trivia. We own every superhero movie ever made (well, maybe not, but it sure seems like it).  My daughter has had to devise a new laugh just to express her near inexpressible joy at her various ‘nonsocial hobbies and pursuits.’  My son practically vibrates when he can nitpick the techno-babble of his favorite shows.  An example is when, in episode 4 of Doctor Who, “Aliens of London,” news crews announce a crashed UFO, my son is quick to point out that the ship is in fact identified, and very much not flying, so it is pretty much just an O.  This tickles him to no end.

I posted on Facebook earlier this week how my husband and kids got into a rather detailed discussion about the differences between zombies and mummies.  Much to my surprise, my sister and niece both popped in to enhance the conversation!  I can’t escape! 

But, when I look at it from the perspective of the quote above, I must wonder. What could be better than being surrounded by nerds?  I want to be enthusiastic about life!  How boring to be too cool to really get into the things that might excite you.  With that as an alternative, give me a life-full of nerds any day!

Don’t Stop Learning

I’m kind of a nerd.  I like words a lot.  Grammar jokes tickle me to an extreme.  It is embarrassing, really. I own and wear this shirt.  And I laugh every time I read it.  I am that big of  a nerd. 

 

I think most people have pet peeves.  I think nerds have their own set of pet peeves.  Or maybe not.  Maybe it is just me.  Either way, this is my nerdy pet peeve.  “You use big words. Stop it! I don't want to learn them. I want to be simple. Not high falutin’”

I get this more than I like.  And I obey.  I try to use words that are less exact because I don’t want to get yelled at for using a more beautiful and precise word that the hear-er may not know or like.  But on the inside….

 
So, you are done learning ?!?!?
But you are alive!  Why?  I can think of two options.   First, you have more to learn and there is a possibility that you might need to acquire new words to allow for and to express more mature or broader thoughts, ideas and concepts. The other option is that you truly have no more to learn beyond what you absorbed in high school and you are here only to apportion your prodigious and amaranthine knowledge on the world. Those big scary words that you don’t like to use aren’t words that you don’t know; you just like to be approachable to the bourgeois class.  You are a magnanimous philanthrope !

I know it would be wrong for me to try to judge which of these options is reality in your individual case, so I’ll leave it to you.

Running

There is this fantastic little smart phone app for which I am so thankful. It tacks your running, walking or cylcling miles and donates money per mile to charities of your choice.  It means a lot to me to find a way to give to organizations while I meet my personal goals. On hard days, Charity Miles is the only thing that gets me out the door.
March 9, 2012 I decided I needed to get healthy. I was facing increasingly serious health issues because of my weight; the most devastating was the invisible problem of depression. So I got moving. By September I lost 75 pounds and regained my sense of self, renewed health and energy, plus an uncontainable joy and enthusiasm for life that I thought was gone forever.
But I have a new problem that is really an old problem. When I was 14, I started fainting. I have a dual diagnosis of extremely low blood pressure and an autonomic nervous disorder. Both cause me to faint, and the weight loss lowered my blood pressure to such an extreme that I was fainting nearly every day.
It hasn't been easy to find the perfect balance of medicine, exercise and living a 'normal' life.

It has all been worth it to discover this new self. I am an "I can" person now. For almost two decades I "I can't"-Ed myself through life. I hid and escaped in fear and embarrassment. I gained weight and further disabled myself.

That has changed.  I am better now.  I can.  I can do so much more than I ever thought. Unfortunately I had a major set back in December and I feel as though I am clawing myself back to what I had.

Running is SO HARD!!  With my blood pressure, it risks fainting and drop in my core temp, and my joints just started protesting recently. But I am learning that so hard isn't too hard. I am learning that obstacles aren't barriers. And I am learning that just because I look ridiculous doing it, doesn't mean I can’t do it. like being able, even if I look like an idiot and have no class or flair. :)

Here’s a good laugh on the same vein.  I may not look as awesome as I think I do, but it truly isn’t reason enough to quit! I can’t figure out how to give proper credit to this picture.  I can’t find the original website or anything.

Marriage

Marriage is a beautiful thing.  I see it as an expression of the relationship that Christ desires with the church.  It is a marvelous mystery.

The thing about marriage is its exclusivity; intimacy that includes sexuality, but extends far beyond it.  I do things with my husband I do with no one else. Repeatedly doing things with only him has developed a whole encyclopedia of non-verbal communication. It is a marvelous mystery.

My body.  I see flaws.  But my husband sees perfection. I will never be in a magazine or on a movie screen. According to any standard, I am flawed. I can expertly send myself into a spiral that rivals those of  any self-respecting/loathing American woman by just looking at this lame-ass body of mine.  But when my body is in Brian's arms, joined to his in friendship and love, it is perfect.  It is a marvelous mystery.

I am thankful for my married life.  This is a time where we have a lot of anniversaries, celebrating the day we met, our first date, that kind of thing.  Our wedding anniversary is right around the corner.  Our first year together was this crazy, unadvisable whirlwind of leaning on one another.  I don’t know how we survived it.  It is a marvelous mystery.

Cussing

My sweet girl has a friend who cusses.  She asked what I thought about it.  This isn’t the first time we have talked about this particular topic.  In fact, I remember when my kids were little wee things and they were playing a game of Go Fish together.  My darling angel girl at a whole two years old was sweetly repeating the same phrase each time she had to go, fish.  We kept listening to try to figure out what she was saying when, in horror, we realized she was practically chirping, ‘damn it.’  What?!?!  Why?  Who says that?  And so began our first sit-down together.

We have talked about all the whys of cussing.  And we have underlined our emphatic desire that they never react to someone else cussing.  Our basic stance is that we prefer to keep their mouths clean (the Bible teaches us to not use coarse language and we have friends who are deeply offended by it) but we want them authentic.  Don't put on a mask just to avoid getting caught by us.  If they want to say a ‘bad’ word, however, they will face any and all consequences, including anything that may come their way from the parents of friends. If they are old enough to choose offensive words, then they have to be old enough to deal with the responses.

I cuss.
I'm not supposed to.
But I do.
Sometimes I cuss in anger.  Sometimes I cuss because I think the word actually receives less power and attention than what we give it when we perform acrobatics to convey the word without actually saying it. Sometimes that becomes ridiculously silly and I prefer to avoid it.  Sometimes I cuss because it is the vocabulary word that best expresses my meaning.

 

Matthew 12:25, 36, 37 NASB

"And knowing their thoughts Jesus said to them, "Any kingdom divided against itself is laid waste; and any city or house divided against itself will not stand. But I tell you that every careless word that people speak, they shall give an accounting for it in the day of judgment. For by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.""

That’s certainly something to think about.  I don’t know that it refers only to cuss words.  I think our more careless words are ones that are of the dismissive or gossip variety. We will be accountable for these.

Then there is this.  I am reading a book called The Twenty-Piece Shuffle: Why the Poor and Rich Need Each Other by Greg Paul.  In it he tells about his church.  He belongs to a church that includes homeless and addicts along with the wealthy and middle class.  He tells about one day when a new suburban couple came to visit.  The church meets in a circle and they were praying with the author positioned so he could see the faces of the new family and the tortured addict who was currently praying.  This man was pouring his heart out in anguish. At the end, he punctuated the prayer with an unprintable word.  The author shares how he watched the reactions of the new family. 

The adults kept heads bowed, eyes closed and faces serene.  The two little girls popped up heads, popped open eyes.  Seeing no other reactions in the gathering, they quickly resumed the ‘proper praying position.’  The author shares that he figured that was the last time they’d ever see that fine family.  Not so.  They are active members of that body and had been for three years when the author finally asked the lady if she remembered her first visit.  Of course she did.  And she remembered the man’s anguished prayer.  And she remembered that word he used.  What did she think?  She said she knew she was home!  From the book:

She continued on to speak of her deep hunger for “unmitigated reality”—the possibility of being thoroughly honest about her own internal needs and battles and of receiving the gift of such honesty from others. She longed to break bread and drink wine, she said, for true communion, the knowledge that “we”—some undefined group of pilgrims—were walking the same road in unity with each other, a unity found in and leading to Christ himself. Her middle-class (that is, wealthy) church and life experience, where every messy thing is so carefully contained, every surface so diligently polished, had left her with a sense of discontentment, of empty wandering. She wanted to get her hands on Jesus.

Maybe this is another reason why I cuss.  Because it is real.  If I think it, I say it.  I don’t advocate such an unfiltered life.  It is hard on relationships and very hard on one’s reputation.  People often don’t care to hear everything I am thinking.  But there are a cherished few who do.  They want to know, because they actually love me.  Not what I do, or how I am, but me.  All of me.  And they bother to journey this life towards Jesus with me.  Not polished and shined.  We have not arrived.  But striving and real.  So, sometimes I cuss…

Omni-Omni

So, I was reading Mark chapter four.  I have included the passage below for your easy reference.  Verses 12 and 41 stood out to me most.
Twelve says that he speaks in parables to fulfill prophesy that people will hear and not understand. Sadly, I do NOT understand. It seems like a set up. Is it a filtering system?  A way to fulfill prophesy?  Any idea I come up with unravels because God is God. God set up the prophesy in the first place. Why?  Filtering seems off because he made us all and the Bible says he wants us all to come to him. But then he is purposefully oblique?  It doesn't make sense.  Even the chosen require interpretation. The disciples ask Jesus what the parables mean.

Verse forty-one intrigues me because it reveals our minds. The disciples were following Jesus. They left their lives, their own plans, behind for this guy. They witnessed healings. They saw him answer the unanswerables.  If they didn't yet know he was Messiah they surely knew he was special. But even so they are shocked by his calming of the storm. I see myself in that. God is great. Omni-omni. But I still am surprised by what He does. If someone were witnessing my life, they might think I was in the businesses of limiting him.

 

 

^Mark4 Once again Jesus began teaching by the lakeshore. A very large crowd soon gathered around him, so he got into a boat. Then he sat in the boat while all the people remained on the shore. ² He taught them by telling many stories in the form of parables, such as this one:

³ “Listen! A farmer went out to plant some seed. ⁴ As he scattered it across his field, some of the seed fell on a footpath, and the birds came and ate it. ⁵ Other seed fell on shallow soil with underlying rock. The seed sprouted quickly because the soil was shallow. ⁶ But the plant soon wilted under the hot sun, and since it didn’t have deep roots, it died. ⁷ Other seed fell among thorns that grew up and choked out the tender plants so they produced no grain. ⁸ Still other seeds fell on fertile soil, and they sprouted, grew, and produced a crop that was thirty, sixty, and even a hundred times as much as had been planted!” ⁹ Then he said, “Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand.”

¹⁰ Later, when Jesus was alone with the twelve disciples and with the others who were gathered around, they asked him what the parables meant.

¹¹ He replied, “You are permitted to understand the secret of the Kingdom of God. But I use parables for everything I say to outsiders, ¹² so that the Scriptures might be fulfilled:

‘When they see what I do,
they will learn nothing.
When they hear what I say,
they will not understand.
Otherwise, they will turn to me
and be forgiven.’^[b]”

¹³ Then Jesus said to them, “If you can’t understand the meaning of this parable, how will you understand all the other parables? ¹⁴ The farmer plants seed by taking God’s word to others. ¹⁵ The seed that fell on the footpath represents those who hear the message, only to have Satan come at once and take it away. ¹⁶ The seed on the rocky soil represents those who hear the message and immediately receive it with joy. ¹⁷ But since they don’t have deep roots, they don’t last long. They fall away as soon as they have problems or are persecuted for believing God’s word. ¹⁸ The seed that fell among the thorns represents others who hear God’s word, ¹⁹ but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life, the lure of wealth, and the desire for other things, so no fruit is produced. ²⁰ And the seed that fell on good soil represents those who hear and accept God’s word and produce a harvest of thirty, sixty, or even a hundred times as much as had been planted!”

Parable of the Lamp

²¹ Then Jesus asked them, “Would anyone light a lamp and then put it under a basket or under a bed? Of course not! A lamp is placed on a stand, where its light will shine. ²² For everything that is hidden will eventually be brought into the open, and every secret will be brought to light. ²³ Anyone with ears to hear should listen and understand.”

²⁴ Then he added, “Pay close attention to what you hear. The closer you listen, the more understanding you will be given^[c]—and you will receive even more. ²⁵ To those who listen to my teaching, more understanding will be given. But for those who are not listening, even what little understanding they have will be taken away from them.”

Parable of the Growing Seed

²⁶ Jesus also said, “The Kingdom of God is like a farmer who scatters seed on the ground. ²⁷ Night and day, while he’s asleep or awake, the seed sprouts and grows, but he does not understand how it happens. ²⁸ The earth produces the crops on its own. First a leaf blade pushes through, then the heads of wheat are formed, and finally the grain ripens. ²⁹ And as soon as the grain is ready, the farmer comes and harvests it with a sickle, for the harvest time has come.”

Parable of the Mustard Seed

³⁰ Jesus said, “How can I describe the Kingdom of God? What story should I use to illustrate it? ³¹ It is like a mustard seed planted in the ground. It is the smallest of all seeds, ³² but it becomes the largest of all garden plants; it grows long branches, and birds can make nests in its shade.”

³³ Jesus used many similar stories and illustrations to teach the people as much as they could understand. ³⁴ In fact, in his public ministry he never taught without using parables; but afterward, when he was alone with his disciples, he explained everything to them.

Jesus Calms the Storm

³⁵ As evening came, Jesus said to his disciples, “Let’s cross to the other side of the lake.” ³⁶ So they took Jesus in the boat and started out, leaving the crowds behind (although other boats followed). ³⁷ But soon a fierce storm came up. High waves were breaking into the boat, and it began to fill with water.

³⁸ Jesus was sleeping at the back of the boat with his head on a cushion. The disciples woke him up, shouting, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?”

³⁹ When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm. ⁴⁰ Then he asked them, “Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?”

⁴¹ The disciples were absolutely terrified. “Who is this man?” they asked each other. “Even the wind and waves obey him!”