Life Lessons

I shared these on the KidsROCK blog on Monday, but I wanted to have them, here, as well.  It seems fitting to discuss life lessons on this, our first day of the new school year!

• To be “Smokin’” is a good thing, unless it is with a vacuum or electric weed eater.
• When the brownie box reads, ‘stir by hand,’ it means to stir with a spoon. 
• Lemonade requires more ‘ade’ than lemon.
• Ants in a heated sandwich maker will explode.
• Chestnuts in a toaster oven will explode. 
• Ceiling fans will not hold a person’s weight.
• When they say they will be at your house between 7 am and 5 pm, they also mean that they could very possibly not show up at all.
• Sometimes it is better to just throw it away than to try to salvage items caught within range of a diaper blowout.
• No matter how right you may be, the moment you begin yelling about it you become wrong.
• When Mom asks, “Do you wanna…,” she’s not really asking.

Have you got any great life lessons to share?