Sunday, August 29, 2010

It isn’t Easy to be Mom

Last night was supposed to be a special treat.  Daddy was away and we do like to play!  The kids sleep in my room when my darling husband is out of the house. We read stories, sing songs, play games and I tell them about when they were babies.  That last part is probably their favorite part, the little narcissists!

My secret from them is that the tradition is just as much for my peace of mind as it is fun for the kids.  I like to have everyone close by without a man in the house to keep us safe.  When they aren’t I don’t sleep well, and I am straining to hear and identify every little sound.

But yesterday my little girl broke a rule, then covered it up.  In our family, we don’t punish anything like we do lying.  The deal was that the next time she lied, she had to go to bed immediately and stay there until morning—no matter what time of day it was.  And if it was late, she would stay in bed the whole rest of the next day.

See, my gal is very social.  Being alone is the worst punishment ever for her.  Last time she was supposed to go to bed as punishment we granted her a reprieve.  It felt right and we talked about grace and mercy and how we all fall short.  Blah blah blah.  The girl did it again!  I was so disappointed!  Not only do I not tolerate lying, I just get exasperated watching this little darling work against her own best interest.  

Here was our special night and I had to exclude her.  It stinks being a mom.  I didn’t even do it very well.  I went in and stayed with her a while.  We talked about the consequences of lying, masks, trustworthiness, the whole nine yards.  I know it is time to stop talking and just let her bear the consequences, but the little rat is my chick and I happen to like being with her!

When I told my son that she wouldn’t be joining us, I could see he felt the same way.  We were both wanting to just grab her and bring her in for story time. 

This is comparatively a small thing.  She was supposed to clean her room, but hid the junk under towels instead.  No big deal, and perfectly typical.  I hope I am doing the right thing by making it a big deal, though.  I want her to learn the lessons with my fake consequences now so she won’t wander into real trouble with consequences doled out by the real world.  She better learn this lesson toot sweet, because I want to get on with just being a family!

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